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December 8, 2012
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Lone Candle page 30 by Zucca-Xerfantes Lone Candle page 30 by Zucca-Xerfantes
[REDACTED]

Anyway, enjoy this page of Lone Candle, the 30th page no less, where Aries finds herself having just drunk drugged tea and finding that Erton's mother has been helping him the whole time. How do the ogres tie in you may ask?

Come back next time, same Lone Candle time, same Lone Candle place!

Ugh... would someone stop the world from spinning? I'd like to get off...
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:iconlord-godzilla:
This page has a good follow through with the paneling as well as the use of effects. Seeing the mother quietly dispatch a mercenary with subtle techniques is a great follow through and adds to the conspiracy theme that has been building. The use of vivid colors helps punctuate that something unnatural has happened to our protagonist in the dim dull little room and that works like a great visual sucker punch to show the next major turn. All in all, this page helps increase the suspension comfortably but in a believable manner. The dialogue helps broaden the cast as well with some unsettling truths.
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:icongreatkingrat88:
Greatkingrat88 Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2014

The ogres come off as mostly being cartoony. Which is fine, I suppose- but why does she take their word for it? These are suspected kidnappers- would it not make sense to have a look around, and see if they were telling the truth? Maybe look for some clues? If this were an intentional point to show her as being inexperienced, that’s fine- but a point ought to be made of it.

 

Well, the plot finally seems to progress at a normal pace, which is commendable. I do like the investigative aspect, to get to the bottom of things by using your head and your wits.

 

While the break from story back to its narrator isn’t bad per se, it feels like a clumsy way to establish that the woman was, in fact, suspicious. That could have been done more smoothly in the story itself, in my opinion- Passadar showing off her intuition in her thoughts, instead of it being recounted by the narrator.

 

I have to wonder, what prompts her to ask about abuse? It’s a pretty rude question to ask unless you’ve got grounds to suspect it- and I don’t see her having any. It just sort of comes out of the blue, and she’s right. Intuition is well and all, but it can only take you so far.

 

I also think her conclusions are a bit too hasty. All she knows is that the ogres said there was a mage- and she didn’t bother to double check it- and she has assumed that it must be him. Even before meeting her, she has already come to the conclusion that it’s got to be him. She doesn’t know that- the ogres could be wrong, there could be another mage; a lot of options are possible. If she had a solid basis for her suspicions, it would be another thing, but I don’t see it. 

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:icongreyofpta:
GreyOfPTA Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2012
SHe pulled a Fanboy cocktail on her!
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:iconzucca-xerfantes:
Zucca-Xerfantes Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Oh dear.... What does that mean?

Will she pull off a mask... and then...?

Oh crap...
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:iconmbk606:
Mbk606 Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Yeah, I feel like crap too this time of year.
I know, let's you and I and boyking start a fight club!
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:iconlord-godzilla:
Lord-Godzilla Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012
But you broke the first rule! We're not supposed to talk about it!
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:iconmbk606:
Mbk606 Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
*Shrugs and empties and entire bag of lye over Lord-Godzilla*
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:iconzucca-xerfantes:
Zucca-Xerfantes Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Hey, nobody likes a lye'r!
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:iconlord-godzilla:
Lord-Godzilla Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012
*shudders* Bleah!
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:iconzucca-xerfantes:
Zucca-Xerfantes Featured By Owner Dec 15, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I miss your critiques!
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:iconlord-godzilla:
Lord-Godzilla Featured By Owner Dec 16, 2012
This picture wasn't asking for one.
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